When news breaks, we fix it!

I'll confess. I stole the title of this post. You already knew that didn't you? Damn it, I was trying to be clever! I was trying to start you off smiling, because this is not all upbeat and happy.

Anyways, in the news today.....  You may remember earlier this week, I wrote about the pastor in Tennessee who ordered his deacons to attack his own son for being gay? Well, he's been arrested! Hurray! For theft from a copper scrapping yard. Oh... wait, what?

Yes, that's right. In Tennessee, you can apparently get away with having other people beat your own child for you -- in a public place with a crowd of witnesses. But if you steal from a copper scrapping yard... that's the end of the line for you! They don't mess around with this really serious shit!

Sadly, LGBT leader and attorney Paula Ettelbrick died from cancer this morning. (Well, "causes related to cancer" the article I read said. Someone is going to have to explain to me how that's different.) For more than 25 years, Paula worked for organizations that fought for equality -- and not just in the USA but worldwide. She was a member of the International Gay and Lesbian Human Rights Commission, the National Center for Lesbian Rights, the National Gay and Lesbian Task Force, the Empire State Pride Agenda, the Stonewall Community Foundation, and probably countless others. The saddest part is that I don't think a lot of people have heard of her -- and some of the organizations she worked for and was a senior member of are virtually unheard of. But she has done a LOT and devoted her whole life pushing for equality.

An elderly, mentally ill, homeless lesbian named Yvonne Mcneal, who could not even walk without use of a cane, was shot multiple times and killed by police for refusing to drop a set of (not at all concealed) knives when they responded to a domestic dispute call -- the domestic dispute, by the way, was happening over the phone. As in, the police shot Yvonne because they recognized the danger that the knives posed to Yvonne's girlfriend on the other end of the phone.

Why, yes, I too look back and fondly remember the first time I murdered someone by reaching through the phone lines. Good times. (I half expect the FBI to show up on my doorstep and arrest me for saying that. We'll see!)

I figure we need to have some upbeat stuff in this -- but most of my news comes from my Facebook and Google Plus newsfeeds and apparently we're all just not that happy today. So I'm going to pose a question:

How does she do that?! I can't wink like that! Look!

Every time I wink, my other eye bugs out. How do you wink and NOT have your other eye go crazy? Where do you learn to do that?! I want answers, people!